Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, is one of the holiest and most solemn days in the Jewish calendar. It’s a time of reflection, fasting, prayer, and asking for forgiveness.
But if you’re not Jewish or even if you are you might wonder: what do you say to people on Yom Kippur without sounding awkward or disrespectful? 🤔
Saying the right thing can feel a bit tricky, especially because this isn’t a celebratory holiday. The goal is to be thoughtful, respectful, and supportive.
In this guide, we’ll explore practical phrases, what to avoid, and how to express kindness during this sacred time.
Whether you’re offering comfort to a friend, coworker, or neighbor, you’ll learn exactly what to say and just as importantly what not to say.
Let’s dive into the thoughtful ways you can honor someone observing Yom Kippur.
Understanding the Meaning Behind Yom Kippur
Before knowing what to say, it helps to understand the heart of Yom Kippur. This holy day marks a time for personal reflection, repentance, and seeking forgiveness from both God and others. Many people fast, refrain from work, and attend synagogue services from evening to evening.
This is not a festive holiday so avoid saying “Happy Yom Kippur.” Instead, acknowledge the seriousness of the day.
Use case:
Imagine your coworker is Jewish and has mentioned they’re fasting. Rather than saying “Enjoy your holiday,” a better phrase would be:
🔹 “Wishing you an easy fast.”
🔹 “May you have a meaningful Yom Kippur.”
Both are respectful and align with the tone of the day.
Phrases You Can Say to Show Support
Here are thoughtful phrases that are commonly used:
- “G’mar Chatima Tova” (pronounced guh-MAHR kha-tee-MAH toe-VAH) A Hebrew greeting that means “May you be sealed for a good year.”
- “Wishing you an easy and meaningful fast.”
- “I hope this Yom Kippur brings you peace and reflection.”
If you’re not Jewish or don’t feel comfortable using Hebrew, the English versions work just fine. What matters is the intent.
Real-life scenario:
A friend tells you they’ll be offline for Yom Kippur. You could say:
🔹 “I respect that may it be a day of peace and reflection for you.”
What Not to Say on Yom Kippur?
There are well-meaning phrases that can come off the wrong way. Avoid these:
❌ “Happy Yom Kippur”
❌ “Are you having fun?”
❌ “At least you get a day off work!”
These sound tone-deaf because Yom Kippur is solemn and introspective. It’s not about fun it’s about reflection, forgiveness, and spiritual renewal.
Better alternatives:
🔹 “Take care during your fast.”
🔹 “I’ll be thinking of you.”
When in doubt, kindness and simplicity go a long way.
Saying Something After Yom Kippur Ends
Once Yom Kippur is over, people often gather with loved ones to break the fast. This is a good time to check in and offer warm words.
You can say:
- “Hope you had a meaningful fast.”
- “Wishing you a sweet and peaceful year ahead.”
- “Was the fast okay? I was thinking of you today.”
Keep it gentle. Many people are emotionally and physically tired after fasting.
Real-life tip:
If your friend hosted a break-fast meal, you could also say:
🔹 “Thanks for inviting me this food is such a welcome sight!”
How to Talk to Kids About Yom Kippur (or Say Something to Parents)
If you know a family observing Yom Kippur, you might wonder what to say to their kids or to them as parents.
Friendly phrases:
- “I hope today is peaceful for your family.”
- “Wishing your whole family a meaningful day.”
You don’t have to overdo it. Simple kindness is best.
For kids:
🔹 “Are you excited to break the fast tonight?” (If appropriate)
🔹 “Hope your fast goes well just one more nap to go!”
If You’re Not Jewish Is It Okay to Say Something?
Absolutely! Thoughtfulness is always welcome. You don’t need to be Jewish to show care and respect for someone’s tradition.
Stick to short, respectful phrases:
- “Wishing you strength and peace today.”
- “Thinking of you on this sacred day.”
- “May you be sealed in the Book of Life.”
Real-life example:
You’re emailing a colleague and know they’re observing. Add a line like:
🔹 “I hope you have a meaningful Yom Kippur. Talk soon!”
Final Thoughts
At the end of the day, the answer to “what do you say to people on Yom Kippur” is simple: be respectful, kind, and sincere. Avoid festive phrases, and focus on offering support.
Whether you say “G’mar Chatima Tova” or just “Wishing you peace,” your intention matters most.
In a world that often rushes through words, pausing to say something thoughtful can truly mean everything. ✨
